The Hero’s Dream, Chapter VIII

Tags

alternate universe, completed stories, shifting tides series, star wars, the hero's dream

Wow, two posts in two days. Still, after that long hiatus, I have a lot of catching up to do, right? 😉

This chapter: Night falls, Obi-Wan reports to Qui-Gon, and meets an unexpected ally…

[11/2/2013: Changed tagging to reflect current story status; aka, completed.]

Chapter VIII

                Night had fallen hours ago, but Coruscant never slept.

Still, the palace was more calm and empty than it would have been during the day. Obi-Wan made his way briskly down to the cells, located in the subterranean levels of the palace. However, unlike the interrogation cells, these were built for the purpose of detention, impossible to get into or out of, without some sort of key or Force ability on the part of the outsider.

Obi-Wan closed his eyes and carefully concentrated, extending a thousand wisps of ethereal light outward. He felt a pull toward one particular cell… Walking toward the cell, he palmed the door open. He paused for a moment in the doorway, staring down at the prone figure on the floor at the other side of the cell. He advanced into the cell, up to the prisoner. Suddenly, the figure shoved itself up on its elbow, flipping over to face him, revealing a striking young woman not much younger than himself, with sky blue eyes and blonde hair. Her eyes glistened with defiance.

“Listen, Sith, I’m not going to tell you anything, so why don’t you just toddle off and do something more fitted to your abilities, whether it be destroying an entire planet or taking candy from Younglings.” the woman said defiantly. Obi-Wan was taken aback. For a long moment, he couldn’t find anything to say.

“I’m not a Sith,” he said at last. The woman eyed him with obvious distaste and disbelief.

“Prove it.” she said. Obi-Wan pulled in a deep breath. She seemed to be determined to make his job difficult. “How am I supposed to know that this isn’t a trick?” she demanded, distrustfully.

“Because, it isn’t,” Obi-Wan said, annoyed. He made a brisk bow. “Jedi Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi, at your service.” Dropping his mental shields just enough to allow her to probe his mind, Obi-Wan braced himself. Occasionally, allowing less experienced people to access one’s mind could hurt. The movement was brisk, and over more quickly than he had expected. The young woman sighed and leaned back.

“I’m Siri Tachi,” she said.

“Pleasure to meet you. Now let’s get going.”

“Going?” she repeated, confused.

“Yes. I’m not going to leave you here!” he said. “Come on.” He gave her a swift hand up and led her quickly from the cell. He was not about to leave her to be tortured and interrogated.

Moving briskly, they passed quickly through more corridors and passages, all of them dark, dank, musty-smelling, and poorly kept. Siri glanced quickly at her inscrutable, mysterious new ally, curious. He wasn’t lying… but if he was telling the truth, then what was he doing here? And she had never heard of a fellow Jedi by the name he had claimed. She stole a quick peep at him. His face was oddly illuminated by the pale, flickering lighting of the corridor. Handsome, but somewhat disfigured by what appeared to be Sith-style tattoos on one side of his face. He seemed somewhat exasperated, impatient. Who was he?

Siri gave up her mental exploration and shuddered, her mind rambling along dark avenues, wondering what poor wretches lived here, what exactly was that lurking in the shadows… was that a rat? and why did this place even exist, unless it was a monument to pure evil? She pulled slightly closer to her guide, who did not seem unduly bothered by the darkness or disturbing surroundings. Perhaps he had gotten used to the dark all around. Finally, he led her to one room, which seemed even colder, darker, and more decrepit than the others. “You’ll be safe here,” he said, palming the door open. “No one will look for you here. I’m sorry I can’t do better for you.”

“It’s better than a cell,” Siri said with somewhat-forced cheerfulness. A brief flash of a slightly worried yet still dazzling smile, then his face sobered again.

“Where were you taken?”

“Kamino. We were… investigating… reports… reports of a clone army that was being formed. We sensed it… my master’s on the Seers’ Circle… and the Council ordered us to investigate. That was when… we ran into the Sith. They killed my master…”

“What was your master’s name?” Obi-Wan interrupted, leaning forward eagerly, eyes sharp, piercing, searching.

“Tola Finn. He… he… he tried to fight them, to protect me… but there were too many of them…” A tear escaped Siri’s eye and rolled down her cheek. “He died… so slowly… they were mocking him… I tried to fight them but they held onto my sword hand… and the leader threatened that if I didn’t surrender, they’d kill him… so I dropped my lightsaber… what could I do? And then, with no reason… none at all!… they killed him anyway!” Obi-Wan’s eyes were hard, grim.

“Scum.” he gritted out, through clenched teeth. Tears streamed down Siri’s cheeks. Her rescuer’s eyes softened, and he almost hesitantly pulled her close, awkwardly trying to comfort her. “Go on,” he said, somewhat unwillingly. “What were your findings? Who was the leader? I need to know all the details… to report to the Council.”

“We found out that the rumors were true. I think someone… one of the Kaminoans… had been bribed for something, though. That can’t mean anything good… can it?”

“No, it can’t, conceivably, mean anything positive,” he allowed. Slowly, he looked up at the walls. “So they’re preparing for war at last. They should have begun earlier, should have known it earlier. They left it unconscionably late. But who was the leader? Did you see his face?”

“Yes, I did. He was human, tall, with a sort of marble and ebony complexion, not really sallow, but unnaturally pale, clear skin and jet black hair. He had horribly cold, icy, pale blue eyes that seemed to look right through me, as if I was completely transparent… Oh, and he had a scar on one cheek, the right one, I think. It was like an incomplete circle, like a hex or a pentacle in a horror novel.”

“Xanatos. He has a heart of stone. And about how long ago did this happen?”

“About a week ago, I’d say. We arrived on Kamino August 22, standard.”

“That’s five days ago now,” Obi-Wan murmured. “Thank you, Padawan Tachi.”

“Please, call me Siri,” Siri said. “How did you know that I’d been captured? How did you get here? And why are you still hiding me in the Palace? How did you get in?”

“Getting in… that wasn’t a problem. I was born here.” Obi-Wan gave a humorless, bitter laugh, then prepared to depart. “I’ll come back again when I have news. Until then…” He raised a hand and slipped off into the darkness, vanishing in less than a moment. Siri gave a deep sigh and went further into the room, closing the door behind her. She sat down on the bed, thinking over the recent events. She had been a Jedi for far too long to trust anyone overly easily, even someone who had rescued her; deception was rampant in a galaxy controlled by the Sith. And yet, she found that she did trust Obi-Wan, for some reason she herself did not truly understand.

Obi-Wan entered his room, deactivated the listening device that he had discovered there years ago with a swift wave of his hand, and removed a holoprojector from its hiding place. Quickly, he activated it. It was a short time before he received any answer, but at last he was rewarded by the image of Qui-Gon Jinn coming into focus. “Obi-Wan, what is it? It’s the middle of the night. Has your cover…”

“No, Master. It’s not that bad,” Obi-Wan said hastily. “Would you please inform the Council that Master Tola Finn is dead and his Padawan Siri Tachi was captured, but I’m preparing to complete a rescue now. The Sith have commissioned a clone army on Kamino, and one of the Kaminoans has accepted a bribe of some sort. Xanatos headed the group that took Padawan Tachi prisoner.”

“They’re preparing for war?” Qui-Gon asked.

“Well, we’ve known for a while that war was coming. I’m just surprised that they left it so late.” Obi-Wan paused. “I’m also afraid that Sidious might know that we aren’t just a scattered group, but an organized and dangerous rebellion. Why else would we be investigating Kamino, moving in the coordinated way we are? He’ll be looking for our leaders.”

“I’ll inform the Council. Well done, Obi-Wan. Be careful, stay safe.”

“I will, Master.” Obi-Wan smiled reassuringly.

“May the Force be with you, Obi-Wan.”

“And with you, Master.” Obi-Wan shut the com, then relaxed, settling down for a few hours’ rest before the next morning.

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The Hero’s Dream, Chapter VII

Tags

alternate universe, completed stories, shifting tides series, small rants, star wars, the hero's dream

Hello, my beloved readers. Yes, The Hero’s Dream is finally back! With the revisions complete, I am free to take it off its hiatus. Also, I have good news: The series in which The Hero’s Dream is the first installment finally has a title! It will be called Shifting Tides, mainly because it is a story about renewal, and also because it’s very different from the galaxy we’ve all come to know and love, a long time ago and far, far away.

This chapter: More Obi-Wan and Dooku interaction! You know we didn’t get enough of it in Attack of the Clones. Here’s some more of the good stuff!

[11/2/2013: Changed tagging to reflect current story status; aka, completed.]

Chapter VII

                “Punctuality is a virtue,” Dooku observed as Obi-Wan came into the room, absent-mindedly banging the door behind him. Obi-Wan shot him a quick, hard glance.

“As is patience,” he said. Dooku merely stared at him coldly. Obi-Wan stared Dooku straight in the eye. “I doubt that Palpatine agrees.”

“Palpatine is a fool.” Dooku said. “You, my young friend, are merely an object to him.”

“And I’m not to you?” the young man challenged. Dooku acknowledged the hit with a nod. He was… fascinated… by Kenobi’s style. To say the least. Circling, probing the defenses, relentless once he found a gap, making the strike… without mercy. It was a Sith’s style. Dooku was slightly curious as to how deep it ran, since it was so overtly the fighting style of the Dark Side…

It wasn’t.

Dooku paused, shocked by this revelation. It wasn’t a Dark Sider’s true style.

Kenobi never twisted the blade in the wound, never poured salt in an open cut. It was startling to find everything but that one in place… and yet, on the other hand, it fit with everything that made up who the young man was. His very presence murmured with the sense of honor that, by all rights, was outdated by generations. A Jedi’s sense of honor. “Perhaps,” the Sith Lord said, “I should ask you if you have ever used anyone.”

“Were you intending to force a confession, or to make an ad hominem attack, or to efface yourself, or make a point that we have more in common than I think?” Dooku blinked. He hadn’t expected this. Kenobi was nothing if not unpredictable, it seemed. The boy had evaded the strike with the elusive grace of a Soresu master.

“Master Kenobi, how very astute of you.” Dooku said in a low tone. Obi-Wan inclined his head, giving nothing away. “I must admit, you fascinate me.”

“Prepare for disappointment,” Kenobi returned, his voice ice-laden.

“Sidious might not have noticed the one or two curious details about you, but they have not gone unnoticed, I assure you,” Dooku said. Obi-Wan walked slowly over to the table where the chess set waited, surveying it, then moving one pawn out of its place.

“Wait and the chance is lost,” he said. “Your move.” Dooku advanced a rook.

“If Sidious were to meet an unfortunate accident…”

“No.” Obi-Wan snapped. “There’s no love lost between us, but I will not resort to murder. I don’t stab people in the back, or kill them in their sleep. Is that not what happened to Aggradus?”

“Aggradus should have known better than to take the medicine Kolvaya prepared for him,” Dooku sniffed. He poured out two glasses of wine, offering one to Obi-Wan. The slave pressed it away.

“I would be better off dead than on that throne.” he said. “And if I were fool enough to wish to mount it, I would be as good as dead already.”

“Sidious intends to go to Naboo,” Dooku mentioned casually. Obi-Wan frowned.

“Oh, so he has the gall to go there after what he’s done with their Queen-elect?”

“It appears so.” Obi-Wan moved another piece.

“I suppose I’ll be the one that he brings along to push at the assassins when they come.” he said, icy disgust coloring his voice.

“It makes sense, doesn’t it, to put the one who is most likely to survive in the dangerous situation?”

“It’s been only sheer luck that I’m still alive.” Obi-Wan’s agile mind had not been idle. There were possibilities in this… Sidious doubtless meant to bear his insincere condolences to the Naboo, and install a puppet ruler while he was at it. In the galaxy, now, they had the appearance of democracy, not the reality. Dooku raised an eyebrow.

“In my experience, there’s no such thing as luck.” In Obi-Wan’s, as well, not that he was going to let Dooku realize that.

“I’ve drawn the white shell from the box so many times now I’ve lost count. I’ve pulled the ‘life’ card out of the loaded Sabacc deck repeatedly. The odds have been stacked against me and I’ve survived time and time again. If that’s not luck, I don’t know what is.” Obi-Wan’s eyes met Dooku’s and locked, neither one betraying any emotion or thought.

“Perhaps the Force has another purpose for you.” Dooku remarked thoughtfully. “I don’t suppose anyone has ever taken the time to properly explain it to you?” Obi-Wan did not bat an eyelid. He was used to playing this role; here, he was a slave. Not a Jedi. He remained silent. Dooku decided to carry on. “You have doubtless noticed that you are like no other slave in the palace, and that you have the same abilities as the untrained children who are brought here. You are like us; you are Force-sensitive. I am surprised that you retain such a strong grasp on your more unorthodox abilities. Oh, yes, I’ve heard all about that little stunt you pulled in telekinetically flinging a bench at Xanatos while you were chained to the wall. Most children, if they are not trained, simply forget, in time, how to use those abilities. The Force, my young friend, is a sort of energy field. Life projects it, and it, in turn, feeds life. Perhaps you have found that you are more persuasive than most? No? You seem so spoiled, I would have thought that you have been subconsciously influencing others’ minds, in order to get your own way…” Obi-Wan gave Dooku an icy glance. Dooku shot him an unapologetic, white-toothed grin. “The truth hurts, doesn’t it?”

“Not as much as the possibility that you might not be telling it,” Obi-Wan retorted.

“Hmmm,” Dooku murmured, observing the stacked board. Slowly, he moved a bishop forward. “Check.” Obi-Wan promptly knocked it off the board with his king, and brought the king up to leave no option for Dooku.

“Checkmate.” Dooku stared with some surprise at the board.

“A bold move,” he acknowledged. “But reckless. I wonder if it is natural talent, or a series of worthy opponents, that has given you such a gift for effective, if unconventional, military strategy?”

“Possibly both,” Obi-Wan remarked. Blue-gray-green eyes sparked, challenging, pushing past the boundaries. Dooku raised an elegant eyebrow, impressed. The young man’s presence hummed with carefully controlled energy, shrouded and cloaked but impossible to fully hide. Beneath the layers, the slave practically glowed in the Force. The way it swirled around him—as though waiting on his every move—the future changing with every thought, every breath—he wasn’t just a confluence, he was a convergence. Dooku had heard of them before, but had never actually encountered one that had a person as its focus point. Thoughtfully, with his back to Kenobi, Dooku weighed his lightsaber in his hand. He wondered, fleetingly, what a lightsaber constructed by this young man would feel like. The resonances of a saber crystal were echoes of the lightsaber’s maker and user; for good or for ill. It was nearly impossible to imagine, however, since Kenobi kept himself so completely shielded. It was a natural ability that all the stronger-willed palace slaves developed subconsciously, to keep their minds from being invaded, and Kenobi was anything but weak-willed. In fact, Dooku mused, Kenobi had the sort of will that was stronger than the weak corporeal form which was its vessel, the kind of strength that would move mountains. Dooku picked up a training saber and tossed it to the prisoner. It smacked into Obi-Wan’s palm, rife with the solid weight. The echoes even of a saber used only for training were disturbing, to say the least. Obi-Wan closed his eyes briefly, deliberately blocking out the distressing echoes of rage and fear and greed and hate. This duel would probably neutralize some of it, overwriting the evil with his own calm restraint, but it would take intense meditation to completely clean the weapon of its Dark Side alignment, and he could not do that. The training saber flashed into being. Dooku saluted with his own weapon, the hilt curved like the hilt of his full-power lightsaber. Obi-Wan stood on the defensive, allowing some uncertainty that he did not feel to bleed out into the currents surrounding him. As if it had a life of its own, the training saber leaped up to deflect the first strike. Then all was chaos, and light, and heat, and energy. This duel was nothing like the fight with Maul. Maul had not been able to compare to Obi-Wan, at least as far as mentality went. Dooku might possibly be Obi-Wan’s equal in intellect, but was certainly his better in saber skills, even with Obi-Wan’s training, which he could not use anyway. What with having to hold back, Obi-Wan was fighting a losing battle, though, had this been a serious duel, he might have been able to use the unexpected skills he possessed to take Dooku off-guard and claim the victory. At last, Dooku’s saber slipped through his all-too-weak defenses, burning his arm. Obi-Wan deliberately made an initiate’s mistake, dropping the saber and grasping at his arm with a gasp. Dooku’s lightsaber hummed down, grazing his leg. Obi-Wan gave a low hissing cry of pain and staggered to the ground, with Dooku prowling around him.

“Never drop your saber, young one,” Dooku scolded. Obi-Wan slowly, painfully pushed himself up from the ground. He was burned, not cut, and though the injuries would hurt for a few days, they wouldn’t be seriously incommoding. “I think this is a good place to conclude our lesson,” Dooku remarked. Obi-Wan bowed silently, and went out. He was gone before the Sith could do anything about it.

Vietnam

Tags

military, poetry, politics, small rants

This is my commentary in verse on Vietnam, and the people’s response to it, and the military’s response as well. In my opinion, Vietnam was one of the saddest moments in our history, and this poem is dedicated to our military and those who support it, especially the numerous military families across the nation who now struggle to put food on the table, due to cuts in military spending. I know I am voicing an opinion that may be unpopular with some of my readers, but the military is important, even in peacetime, and there are other parts of the budget that are not so crucial, but are getting more attention than the Department of Defense.

This poem was written for those who died in Vietnam, and those who still struggle to cope with the things that they saw and did there. If any of you out there believe in the power of prayer, I would ask that you pray for our military, the active members, the reservists, and the retired all three today. They certainly need all our prayers. Thank you in advance.

Vietnam

When we were going off to war

They handed us bouquets before

We stepped on board the plane

That took us away to our new corps.

Now they send paper flowers stained blood-red,

As if we didn’t know the dead

By face, by voice, by name

The ones who’ll never come home again.

They really think we do not care,

They think we didn’t see hell’s mouth open there,

And sorrow taught us how to fear–

They’d cry too, if they’d been here.

Endurance

Tags

completed stories, contrast, short stories, star wars

Hello, once again! I’m back, this time with an exercise in contrast, between our two heroes: Anakin and Obi-Wan! (This is sort of my own commentary on the Jedi Code and what I think it really means. Sometimes, the words just fall short, know what I mean? 😉 ) Anyway, enjoy, and tell me what you think. 🙂

Endurance

There is no emotion, there is peace.

                Obi-Wan stands beside the funeral pyre, no tears in his eyes. He can not even cry for his master. He has tasted what vengeance could be and it has no allure for him. Qui-Gon is with the Force, but Obi-Wan’s heart is still broken. Still, Obi-Wan may not forget… but he will try to forgive.

Anakin looks up at the strange young Jedi beside him. The young man’s face is impassive, emotionless. And Anakin does not understand. He does not understand. If Obi-Wan is so determined to be a coward, Anakin will not forgive, and he will not forget.

 

Anakin stands in the middle of the Tuskens’ camp, among all the bodies, and at last begins to understand what he has done. Shame grips his heart, but hatred and revenge are stronger, choking out his love for his mother. What would Obi-Wan say? And in that moment, Anakin decides that Obi-Wan must never know of this.

 

Obi-Wan looks at Satine across the space between them. She is more lovely than ever, he thinks. But the space remains. He may regret, but he will not look back.

Anakin closes the space between himself and his beloved wife. He holds her in his arms. Life is too short for regrets, and he doesn’t want to allow himself the time to look back. He will not feel guilty for his happiness. This is another thing that he will not tell Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan watches from behind a pillar, not wanting to snoop, but unable to rip his gaze away. Poisoner, the devil on his shoulder whispers in his ear. Obi-Wan quenches the thought in a breath of flames. Padme is no poisoner. He is glad he was only here by accident. He will not tell the Council. How can he? He will keep Anakin’s secret, and pray that Anakin will not live to regret it. After all, he himself knows what love is like.

There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.

                “Why am I studying this stupid thing, again?” Anakin snarls, in a foul mood. Obi-Wan takes a deep breath.

“Patience, Anakin. Just because you’re the Chosen One doesn’t mean you already know everything.” Anakin snarls again, but this time, he does it because he knows that Obi-Wan is right.

He always is.

“And that’s another fallacy, Anakin.”

There is no passion, there is serenity.

                “Come to your senses!” Obi-Wan shouts. “If Padme was in your place, what would she do?”

“Her duty.”

Neither of them is patient with the other. Padme would have eased the nails on the chalkboard, and not for the last time does Obi-Wan wish she had not fallen out of the gunship.

There is no chaos, there is harmony.

                Anakin’s room is a mess. Again. “Anakin, come clean up your room.”

“Yours is a mess, too.” Obi-Wan laughs.

“That’s only because you don’t understand my filing system.” Anakin throws his cloak in the closet.

“Clean freak.”

There is no death, there is the Force.

                Vader stares, disbelieving, as the cloak drops to the floor, empty. Perhaps the Jedi Code is not so mistaken as he once thought… And Obi-Wan was always a better follower of it. I wasn’t perfect, a voice not his own that he half-thought he had imagined whispered behind his mind.

In the end, my Padawan, I did not really win. I did not have to ‘win.’ I just outlasted you.

Because I’ve been holding out on you all this time.

I knew about Padme.

I worried about Ahsoka.

I was sickened by Palpatine.

And finally, I was taught by my Master.

You said the circle is complete, Anakin. You don’t really know how right you are.

But you don’t know what makes it complete, even after all these years.

To make the circle complete… you have to learn once again.

After all, my Padawan, what is the Force, but life?

And the Force is eternal.

Death is only part of the circle.

Death is not the end.

Because life is eternal.

It is time to learn again, my Padawan.

Because of You

Tags

completed stories, short stories, small rants, song-related fiction, star wars

Yes, my beloved readers, this is yet another example of one of sweet Iris’s fandoms invading my work. In this case, her love of country music in general, and Taylor Swift and Kelly Clarkson in particular. The song belongs to Kelly Clarkson, not to me. Enjoy!

Because of You

I will not make

The same mistakes that you did

                Obi-Wan Kenobi turned his face away from the sandy blast that assailed his face. Did anything matter any more? Anakin was gone. And nothing he could do would bring him back.

I will not let myself

Cause my heart so much misery

                Anakin had chosen his way. He had chosen the Dark Side. And in doing so, he had condemned himself to endless suffering.

And condemned Obi-Wan alongside him.

I will not break the way you did,

                But Obi-Wan had never given in. He did not break easily. He was too strong to die of a broken heart, as Padme had, though his bond with Anakin had been stronger than the bond that connected Anakin to Padme… at least on his end.

You fell so hard

I’ve learned the hard way

To never let it get that far

                Obi-Wan closed the door behind him. He had to watch over Luke. It was the only thing he had left to live for.

He would not let Luke into his heart.

He would not make the same mistakes all over again.

But in the end, he had no choice.

And decided he would have done it all over again.

Because of you

I never stray too far from the sidewalk

                “Anakin! That was stupid!” Obi-Wan shouted. Anakin shot him that same reckless grin. Obi-Wan shook his head, and found that he was laughing. He chased Anakin down and pulled him close. Then dived off the railing.

Because of you

I learned to play on the safe side so I don’t get hurt

                Obi-Wan tumbled sideways, his arm flopping uselessly beside him. Anakin jumped down and helped him up. “Oh, Master, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry…” Obi-Wan raised his good hand and caressed Anakin’s cheek.

                “Stop talking. This time, it wasn’t your fault.”

Because of you

I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me

                “How can I trust you any more, Anakin?” Obi-Wan whispered, anger spent. Anakin’s huge electric blue eyes stared back at him, mournful.

Because of you

I am afraid

Because of you

                Obi-Wan bowed his head. That was all in the past.

And he was haunted. And afraid. And suffering.

And alone.

I lose my way

And it’s not too long before you point it out

                “That’s the wrong door, Master!” Obi-Wan winced at the voice. Anakin was laughing again. How was Anakin to know that Obi-Wan didn’t like that pointed out?

                After all, Obi-Wan had never told him.

I cannot cry

Because I know that’s weakness in your eyes

                Obi-Wan bowed his head. Qui-Gon was dead. And he had no tears left to cry. A tiny voice beside him. Obi-Wan almost smiled at the boy, but found he couldn’t. So instead, he settled for looking earnest.

                Years later, Anakin stood before him. “Qui-Gon died, master. And you never shed a tear for him.” Obi-Wan dropped his head. He couldn’t speak.

I’m forced to fake

A smile, a laugh every day of my life

                What do you want me to be for you, Anakin? he was screaming silently. I can’t be what you want me to be. Why do you keep on asking!

And now my heart can’t possibly break

When it wasn’t even whole to start with

                “You have no heart, Master.” A young man was staring at him with stone-cold eyes, eyes the color of sulfur. Then why are you trampling on it? Obi-Wan wanted to ask. But he couldn’t.

Because of you

I never stray too far from the sidewalk

Because of you

I learned to play on the safe side so I don’t get hurt

Because of you

I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me

Because of you

I am afraid

Because of you

                Battles, fights, one after the other. It was becoming hard to remember what it was like before. When there was peace. Anakin throve in these circumstances, but they also harmed him more than he knew.

                Obi-Wan knew. He tried to heal it.

                But he still couldn’t say it.

I watched you die

                The new-made Sith lay down on the banks of the lava river, eyes yellow with hate. “You were the Chosen One! It was said you would destroy the Sith, not join them! Bring balance to the Force, not leave it in darkness!” Please, Anakin. Give me a sign. Redeem me as you redeemed me the night I realized that I could not wallow in my own grief, because you were there and you needed me, the night Qui-Gon died. Please, save me.

“I HATE YOU!”

                “You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you.” How can I watch you burn like this? I can’t watch anyone else burn. Don’t make me watch. Obi-Wan turned away, picking up Anakin’s lightsaber. He looks back once.

                And then never again.

                It’s broken. The world falls apart around him.

I heard you cry

Every night in your sleep

                “Anakin, please, wake up. Talk to me.” Obi-Wan pleaded. Anakin came awake, eyes angry.

                “Just so you can say that ‘dreams pass in time’?” he snarled. Obi-Wan felt another part of himself shatter. And he can’t say it.

                There is silence.

I was so young

You should have known

Better than to lean on me

                He had been too young to teach Anakin. In the end, the Council had been right. About everything. It was too much. He was too young to teach Anakin. Anakin had needed someone better. Anakin had deserved better than him.

You never thought of anyone else

You just saw your pain

                It was true. Anakin had never looked past himself.

And in the end, that inability to see past what he wanted had destroyed him.

And now I cry in the middle of the night

For the same damn thing

                Obi-Wan awoke in the middle of the night. It was the same nightmare. Every time. Qui-Gon became Anakin lying below him, or he cut down Darth Maul just to see that he had murdered Anakin instead. Dreams. Dreams passed in time. The Force was unbalanced. Things were wrong.

But time was crueler than he had known back when he had said that to Anakin.

Because of you

I never stray too far from the sidewalk

                Luke had his father’s eyes. Obi-Wan looked at him and was reminded of Anakin, the innocent child that he had been, not the monster that he had become.

The monster that Obi-Wan had made him into.

Because of you

I learned to play on the safe side so I don’t get hurt

                Luke’s family—Beru and Owen—loving, sweet, kindly Beru and stern but caring Owen, Owen who bore the same name as Obi-Wan’s own brother—had been murdered. Yet another sacrifice that Obi-Wan had failed to assuage.

“I want to come with you to Alderaan. There’s nothing for me here now. I want to learn the ways of the Force and become a Jedi, like my father.”

And they were at the same impasse again. Obi-Wan was going to go through the same drill again.

This time, Anakin… This time I swear to you that I will not fail you.

It was time.

Because of you

I try my hardest just to forget everything

                “I have been waiting for you, Obi-Wan. We meet again at last.”

No turning back now.

Because of you

I don’t know how to let anyone else in

                “The circle is now complete. When I left you, I was but the learner. Now I am the master.” Yes, Anakin. The circle is complete. You don’t understand just how right you are. From birth to death, and this is the end for me. I will not fail you again. Hope. Luke. Courage. Leia. Victory.

Because of you

I’m ashamed of my life because it’s empty

                An empty robe on the floor. That’s all he had left behind. It hadn’t hurted. Not at all.

“Qui-Gon!”

“Obi-Wan.”

Reunited.

Victory.

Because of you

I am afraid

Because of you

                I’ll wait for you, Anakin. Because whether you like it or not, you are going to follow me.

                Because you have to.

Mordred’s Lullaby

Tags

alternate universe, bbc merlin, clone wars, completed stories, short stories, song-related fiction, star wars

Hello all! I found this song online (well, actually Iris told me to go look it up online) and I absolutely LOVED it. It’s kind of a dark lullaby that Morgan Le Fay would sing to Mordred. The story about Mordred (that is, if you don’t watch BBC’s Merlin, in which Mordred’s backstory is different) is that he is the son of Morgan and her half-brother, Arthur; he was raised by Morgan to be the bane of Arthur. It’s a great song, rather creepy but still amazing. All credits for the song go to the wonderful Heather Dale. I hope you enjoy the fic, which is kind of based around the song. Note: It’s in the same AU as the other short fics I’ve been publishing lately; in this story line, Qui-Gon did not die, and it’s Obi-Wan and not Anakin who is the Chosen One. (Hence the “stolen birthright” in the last verse, before the chorus, from Sidious’ point of view. Made things interesting.) Anyway, enjoy!

Mordred’s Lullaby

                Sharya shudders as she holds her newborn son close. She knows she doesn’t have long to spend with him. Her time grows short. She breathes in, out, focusing on each pulse, the essence of her own life held in her own arms as the life that is left in her fades away.

Hush child, the darkness will rise from the deep

And carry you down into sleep

Child, the darkness will rise from the deep

And carry you down into sleep

                Qui-Gon takes the boy’s hand in his own, gripping it firmly. Another innocent child by his side for as long as he will train him. This is the third Padawan he’s taken, and will probably be his last. He is determined to teach this boy all he knows, and not to let him fall, as long as he is given to guide this child. The Force gives and it takes away, like Time both benefactor and creeping thief.

Guileless son, I’ll shape your belief

And you’ll always know that your father’s a thief

And you won’t understand the cause of your grief

But you’ll always follow the voices beneath

                The ghosts of long gone times swirl around him in his dreams at night, whispering to him. The saints protect him, and the angels, his departed brothers and sisters, guide his way. He is given this life for one purpose, and one purpose only.

To redeem the lost souls, and to free the holy ones.

Loyalty, loyalty, loyalty, loyalty,

Loyalty, loyalty, loyalty, only to me.

                Another day came, another voice sang the lullaby. Tahl leans over her friend’s ward, ghosting gentle fingers over perfectly smooth cheeks. It has been entrusted to her to protect and nurture the young life before her, and she will discharge her duty, even if it kills her. Even if she goes to the grave in silence, at least she will do one thing worthwhile.

Hush child, the darkness will rise from the deep

And carry you down into sleep

Child, the darkness will rise from the deep

And carry you down into sleep

                Obi-Wan watches as Padme follows Anakin away, feeling deep within that something is breaking, even as a bond that has long lain dormant re-asserts itself. He knows there is something between them, but he does not speak his thought aloud. He is not going to give Anakin’s secret away. How can he? How can he violate their trust?

Guileless son, your spirit will hate her,

The flower who married my brother the traitor,

And you will expose his puppeteer behavior

For you are the proof of how he betrayed her.

                Ghostly fingers brush across his cheek in the night. She is here again; his savior, his guardian angel. She has come to help him again, to aid him through the dark watches that do not ease his rest. She is the goddess of mercy, the one who offers hope without limit, though not unmingled with pain, aiding him through the difficult nights.

Loyalty, loyalty, loyalty, loyalty,

Loyalty, loyalty, loyalty, only to me.

                He isn’t sleeping soundly. Padme rushes into the room. Her “ward” is moving restlessly on the bed, not really awake, not truly asleep. Padme tries to hush him, but without success. Shmi rushes in to Padme’s aid. Pressing the man’s shoulders down, she quickly calms him with a lullaby. Looking down at her friend, Padme wondered, thinking how childlike and innocent he looks.

Hush child, the darkness will rise from the deep

And carry you down into sleep

Child, the darkness will rise from the deep

And carry you down into sleep

                Sidious watches from afar as the young Jedi continues to live and grow and discover his own true power. As far as Sidious is concerned, the man before him is not the true Chosen One, but a usurper. Skywalker deserves the power, should have had the power. And a false fulfiller of prophecy can not be allowed to live. The Chosen One will die.

Guileless son, each day you grow older

Each moment I’m watching my vengeance unfold,

For the child of my body, the flesh of my soul

Will die in returning the birthright he stole.

                The Dark Lord’s mind is turned to something else, poisoning Skywalker’s mind, making him believe in lies, pulling him into the twisted maze of the Dark Side. It is only a matter of time until he can turn his pawn fully into the Dark, and set him against the Chosen One.

Loyalty, loyalty, loyalty, loyalty,

Loyalty, loyalty, loyalty, only to me.

                Sharya hovers beside the bed of her son, protecting him, humming the lullaby once again. She can not protect him from his destiny, but she can prepare him for it.

Hush child, the darkness will rise from the deep

And carry you down into sleep

Child, the darkness will rise from the deep

And carry you down into sleep.

                The time is coming, coming fast, when their world will be changed forever. The tides of fate are rushing them on and on, faster and faster, toward a confrontation.

Light against Dark, once and for all. And only one can prevail.

Okay, I kind of forgot to mention… Padme and Obi-Wan managed to buy Shmi’s freedom, and Shmi is now helping Padme out as a Senator’s aide. Yeah. Confusing… sorry about that. :-S

A link to the song this is based off can be found here.

Another rant, once again.

Tags

clone wars, completely random posts, confusing nonsense, insanity, rambling musings, small rants, star wars, story dynamics

Hello, everyone! I’m here to rage about something new this time.

This time, it’s about Obi-Wan and Ahsoka.

You heard me. No, not romantically, but as a team and a pair of… dare I say it… kindred spirits. Just friends, not quite Master and Apprentice, but still a team.

This is all too rare, in my opinion. Obi-Wan and Ahsoka make a completely awesome team, and get on a bit better than Anakin and Ahsoka do (though maybe that’s just Obi-Wan’s personality coming into play, since Obi-Wan tends to smooth things over,) so why don’t more people catch on? And why didn’t the show’s directors ever do a story with just Obi-Wan and Ahsoka? It would have been interesting to watch, at least…

Just my pet peeve. If you share it, please, give me a shout-out!

Also, if you have any ideas for a story with just Obi-Wan and Ahsoka working together, please tell me. Whether you would like me to write them, or if you’re writing them, I’d love to hear about it! 🙂

Thanks for stopping by, and God Bless!

You Raise Me Up

Tags

alternate universe, completed stories, short stories, song-related fiction, star wars

No, this is not going to be the lyrics for the song. It’s a short story centered around the song. 🙂 Just so you know who wrote it, it was not Josh Groban, though his performance is extremely popular; it was written by Rolf Lovland and Brendan Graham. The copyright belongs to them. The story, however, is all my own creation. I suppose it’s at least partially AU, it falls in the line of some of my other alternate-universe stories. For one thing, it’s in the Clone Wars, yet Qui-Gon is still around…

I love Christian music… it’s my biggest continuous inspiration, and one of my complete obsessions. I think everyone else loves this song, too, whether or not they are Christian… it’s very approachable. Just like “How To Save A Life” is.

Enjoy!

You Raise Me Up

                Qui-Gon stared around the small, underground bunker. Through the busy façade, he could see the troops’ exhaustion. Everyone was tired. They had lost the battle. Everyone looked dull and dry. Out of nowhere, a voice was raised in song, soft and gentle; a simple, soulful sound.

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;

When troubles come and my heart burdened be;

Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,

Until you come and sit awhile with me.

                It was with some surprise that Qui-Gon realized that it was Obi-Wan’s voice. His former Padawan had a remarkable voice, Qui-Gon knew that, but it still caught him off-guard every time he heard it. The voice trembled a little, then steadied and became clearer, even though it was still quiet. A respectful silence began to replace the painful murmur of the tiny, enclosed vaults.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;

You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;

I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;

You raise me up… To more than I can be.

                Now, some of the clone troopers had stopped to listen. The silence grew, and with it grew a sense of serenity perhaps deeper than any Qui-Gon had felt since before the Clone Wars began, a deep inward peace that no Sith could ever shatter. By taking Obi-Wan as his Padawan, Qui-Gon had been given a wonderful gift. By making peace after falling out, he tried to give it back, but it turned out that Obi-Wan only have him more. Is that his destiny? Qui-Gon wondered, pondering over the true fate of the Chosen One. To give of himself until he gives himself entirely away?

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;

You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;

I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;

You raise me up… To more than I can be.

                The voice was gaining in strength and power. Anakin came racing in a manner that was almost subdued across the bunker to Qui-Gon. His eyes were wide and stared into Qui-Gon’s with awe as he gripped the older man’s forearms. “What is it, Master? What is it?” His voice bore a deep urgency, a wonder more powerful than any despair. Qui-Gon smiled at him.

“It’s Obi-Wan’s way of giving us peace amid the battle,” he replied, almost in a whisper. Obi-Wan had always been able to manipulate events using nothing but his voice, inflections, tone. It was an impressive natural gift that made him a natural negotiator, the trait of a leader.

“But how? How?” Anakin asked.

“By laying his heart bare,” Qui-Gon replied simply.

There is no life—no life without its hunger;

Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;

But when you come and I am filled with wonder,

Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.

                A smile, like sun bursting through clouds, leaping up into a fountain of laughter from deep within, had crept into the voice; it was rich with triumph in the knowledge that no evil could ever subdue this joy; no darkness could reign forever. Qui-Gon looked at Anakin and was almost surprised to see tears in the younger man’s eyes.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;

You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;

I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;

You raise me up… To more than I can be.

                As the chorus began to ring out once more, first one voice, and then another and another joined with the first. Qui-Gon and Anakin were both singing at the top of their lungs, borne away on the waves of the endless sea of music. There was sadness and strife and pain ahead, but there was more than that. There was victory and triumph; there was joy and peace. And out of the ashes, there was resurrection.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;

You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;

I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;

You raise me up… To more than I can be.

                And then, there was silence for what seemed like a long moment. Anakin and Qui-Gon looked at each other, hope renewed. Obi-Wan’s voice rose up one last time, to seal the promise.

You raise me up… To more than I can be.

Okay, that didn’t end remotely near where it started… 😛 One way of seeing my faith in my fandoms, this is.

This partly sprang out of a conversation that I had with Iris (my best friend and fellow author.) Basically, I asked, “Since Obi-Wan is not the Chosen One, then what is his destiny?” And the obvious answer was, “Kicking Anakin’s rear back into line.” 😛 But, though that was a joke, it had an element of truth. Obi-Wan is important because he is Anakin’s anchor and moral compass. In my opinion, Obi-Wan is actually stronger than Anakin (at least, stronger of will and definitely morally stronger,) because he is able to put what he wants aside, in order to serve the people of the Republic. In the end, though, Anakin is his undoing. Obi-Wan’s allegiance is to Anakin, though he tries to put his duty ahead of that. In the end, because he won’t accept the suffering that comes his way, Anakin sentences Obi-Wan to suffer. And at the same time, Obi-Wan seals his fate with his own hand and of his own free will.

Hope you enjoyed the story! 🙂 God bless.